2012

So it is 2012, and we are apparently all going to die an excruciatingly painful death in 353 days. However the most pain i seem to be in at the moment is the paper cuts covering my hands as I decided 35 minutes ago to rip off all the photos, magazine cuttings and stickers off the side of my wardrobe and my door. not because its 'a new year and a new me! :D ' and not cause i began to cry about how painstakingly depressing my shitty life is, but simply because I was staring at all the things i used to like and the photos of me with people i don't even say hello to any more and the oldest photos were from p7. when looking at the photos i saw who i used to be and how I don't even see the smallest part of that person any more and I didn't know whether that was a good thing or a bad thing. all I know is that I am sick and tired of everyone being depressing little fucks and not just saying what they think and having to lie about absolutely fucking everything cause they seem to care so bloody much about what everyone thinks about them, when i can guarantee you i will never see/talk to 96% of the people in my year say 2 and a half/3 years from now? i know i have gone very far off the topic i just thought that maybe this might make people realize that all the things they think are important and worth crying rivers over in 2012 will mean anything in the grand scheme of their lives. the point i think i am trying to make is that i personally think over the past 5 years i have changed far too many times because of the people i hung out with and i have fought with so many other people because of the people i hung out with. the point of me ripping off all the pictures was not to forget all those people it was just to show that none of it actually matters. i know that this is all awfully cliché and depressing and very 'my life is shit, I'm a new person' but i just don't see the point in changing the way i am just so that other people can like me, or changing my opinions to agree with other peoples, or having to hang out with people who i know i will never talk to again a year from then when we all clearly have nothing in common but i would just go with it.so basically, the next year and a half of my life is going to be spent with a lot of different people but I'm hoping that after this i will think more carefully about the decisions i make and the way i choose to act just because of other bitches.